Friday, May 1, 2015

Being Comfortable in Your Own Skin

I was thinking about some comments I heard and read over the years about new people going into naturism, specifically at home. Which, by the way, is the best place to start.

Some are asking that someone be nude with them. I'm not sure if its a sexual request or just someone to "hold their hand" during the process of starting out or simply believing that being nude is a social activity that requires two or more people to be together to make it work.
I usually respond with that latter part about it being an activity like a game or work project that requires two or more people.
Here is how I see it for myself:

First question should be asked, "Are you comfortable in your own skin?" That is a comment which is often applied to people who are comfortable about themselves, honest, not worrying about what others think of them, how they dress, where they go, what they do or what they say; however, most of the time this person is not even a nudist or even want to be a nudist. But this concept of being comfortable in your own skin is a great place to start.
I overheard a lady telling another that she found out that "according to a certain style magazine, today's color is blue", meaning that her style of dress and how she appears in public was determined by a magazine that told her what style to wear this year or season or month, and even down to the day, what colors to wear. She is definitely not comfortable in her own skin. She has to depend on what others think, what a style magazine has to say, even though that can be different from one magazine to another, from city to city or state to state. But to her, it is important that she stays up to date with her styles even if it means going shopping every other day for the latest. In the mean time, everyone around her didn't care one whit what she wore that day or what color she was using. She told this to another lady who apparently had the same issue. Birds of a feather flock together, or read the same magazines.
So I hear some who asks questions like "What do you do when you are naked?" "Do I need anyone to be naked with me?" "Can someone come over so we can be naked together?"
These questions are not from someone who can just get up in the morning and be themselves as they always are at home, only without clothing. I do not find cleaning house any easier nude than clothed, (not that I find cleaning the house easy to begin with), but I am much more comfortable nude than clothed at home. Clothing in my home feels like cardboard on me; hot, soggy cardboard. Like something clammy clinging on to me. I am not comfortable in clothing at home, but I somehow deal with it and ignore it when in public. I am so used to be nude at home that I hardly notice it. I am very comfortable in my skin at home. And I am also comfortable being nude in public if given a right chance and social acceptance.
I do try to be socially concerned about my dress in that if I must wear clothing, at least be in somewhat style and care about how I look. My clothes are clean, pressed, and acceptable by general middle-class public standards. It does not have to be this years style (and certainly not that magazines idea of style). Though I am not middle class, I still try to appear in a way that makes it easier to navigate in this society. I am comfortable with that and I am comfortable in my own skin.
Do you have to "do" something when you are nude? Sleep comes to mind. Or cleaning house, or vegging in front of a TV or computer or reading a book or baking a cake.

What does it matter what you do? It's all the same to me. Do or do not. Just be comfortable enough in your own skin that it doesn't matter who is with you or what you are doing.

If my family wants to be dressed while at home, that is their problem. As long as I am free to be nude if I want to be. I do not need them to be nude for my sake. If you have to make something out of it and justify being nude, then you are not comfortable in your own skin enough to just be who and what you are, even if you are clothed.

Personally, I think this is how God wants us to be: Comfortable in our own skin. We need to stop trying to impress the world by living in fear; Constantly looking over our shoulder (shirt or shirtless).  We try to do things as if we are living someone else's life when in actuality, we belong God.   Sure, in a way, we belong to one another and we are our "brothers keeper".  We don't want to live a life of offending others, however, we will offend others and sometimes there is nothing we can do about it simply because some are just easily offended about everything (Social media is loaded with offended people).  All we can do is just get on with our lives.  God wants us to trust Him and believe Him.  No worries.  Just live life.  We make mistakes, fine, everyone does.  God is not standing up there waiting for us to drop the ball so He can drop the wrecking ball on our lives.

Jesus said to not worry about what we eat or drink, or what we wear. (Matt. 6:25-34)  He takes care of the lilies of the fields which is here today and gone tomorrow.  God takes care of the animal Kingdom, but also asks us to take of them as well (naked at the time as I recall).  And God takes care of us.  We let the animal kingdom live as they are, but we don't let each other live as we are.  We force others to comply to our standards and we live in fear of those who impose their standards on us.   Sometimes we do have to comply, but does that mean we must live our lives in fear all the time?

Living nude is an great way of breaking that fear wall.  We live in clothing simply because we fear someone might "see something" and why that causes such mental anguish is beyond me.  I have the same parts as you do (male to male in this case). Some people are large, some are small, some are skinny and some are fat. Some are healthy and some are...well... not so.  We are human beings created in the image and likeness of God (Gen. 1:26) and raw fear (not shame as some believe) is what got Adam and Eve to believe that their bodies are "naked" and need to be hid, even from the Creator Himself!  That is fear over load.  Why live that way when you are in Christ? He forgave us our sins and the Sin of mankind in Adam. John 1:29  What are we waiting for?

What does it take to be a nudist? Just stop wearing and depending on clothing so much.  Quit living in fear.  And be comfortable in who you are, especially if you know who and what you are in Christ.

 Beloved, I pray that in all respects you may "live nude and prosper" and be in good health, just as your soul prospers. (my edited version of 3John 1:2)

Boyd Allen

PS. I do cover up for the sake of the weak. But are you weak? Do you really believe that you are the "weak in Christ"?  Do you feel you are not up to the challenge of a little more meat instead of just soft food? Hebrews 5:12  If you have been a Christian for many years, then you should not be weak and this admonition in Hebrews 5 is not for your sake, it's for the new babes in Christ who are still on the milk of the word.